On a miserable cold day in April, the big question was could the Vale continue there stunning form and achieve 3rd place in the league (then someone reminded the Vale how shit they were against Harriers Arms), anyway with the memories of a 7 goal thriller in the previous fixture everyone was excited about the visit of Wribbenhall.
Danbo tried his best ot get on the good side of the ref prior to kick by offering to help him rub in some deep heat to the top of his groin....or did he mention deep throat...it was difficlut to see what was going, although his brown mop did get tangled somewhat with the ref's pubes.
The gaffer was out with a dodgy ankle and Pierre Gougere failed an early morning fitness test on his hammy, but with Flipper the skippers ankle back to normal the Vale midfield was back to it’s best, well the best that was available that day anyway.
The Vale were quick off the blocks and pressured the Wribbenhall defence, Matty was squared up to by there nobhead number 7 for having the audacity to tackle him. 5 minutes later there equally nobhead like no 6 squared up to Andy because Andy had used the ultimate insult of calling him a dickhead (Andy was too ashamed to comment after the game), so all in all it was determined that wribbenhall’s central midfielders were total wankers - as none of the fruity language was in Portugese the ref did buggerall. Anyway rant over back to the action.
22 minutes in and the Vale pressure showed Matt bore down on goal but his shot was saved by the geriatric keeper, the rebound dropped to Mick on the right wing who crossed it in for chuff, chuff failed to connect but Micker’s cross struck the bag post and nestled in the back of the net.
From a long clearance from Pete, Laan had a chance but his lob just cleared the bar.
Laan didn’t have to wait long for another chance and from a great cross from Chufferoo he flicked it in off the outside of his right foot, cracking goal (well until Dan pointed out that it looked like one of Peter Crouch’s goals...)
The 1st half fizzled out with little else happening.
Wribbenhall finally woke up and came on the attack but Steve and Tim had finally learnt how to communicate and were mopping up everything thrown at them, from one cross though Andy punched (well bitch slapped) a cross that dropped to the Wribbenhall forward but Disco Stu span round 3 times did the splits twice one quick caterpillar and then with one of his hands on his nut sack volleyed off the line.
From another big clearance from the back Laan saw another chance go narrowly wide and to be honest that’s were the action finished.
Suffice to say the following happened
Pete bollocked Steve from 55 yards away for apologising to one of the wribbenhall players (we think he apologised for tackling him, this has yet to be confirmed though)
Steve finally after 24 games actually passed the ball back to Andy during the game.
And finally in the last 10 minutes the Brothwell Bros became there alter ego’s the chuckle brothers and played so clown like that this reporter actually checked there feet at full time to see if they had on size 24 clown shoes.
With 2 games to go the prospect of promotion still hangs in the balance, well it doesn’t really cos no one has a clue how many will go up, bring on the Shite Horse Celtic and there crap haired goalie with no sense of humour ( or is that the Vale keeper……).
