FIRST RED HOT VICTORY AT THE SEWERAGE WORKS GROUND!
Although it was our objective to lose this match in favour of a FREE red hot curry, our inevitable competitive edge took over which resulted in a scorching 6-2 win over Heswall Tandoori.
A bit of a worrying start with Heswall Tandoori turning up late and a lack of subs, which wasn't helped by Steve Fitz who was spotted warming up at the wrong ground and then went home, Mad Marty McNab who fucked off windsurfing with a hangover, and Karl who just couldn't be arsed informing the management that he wasn't going to fucking bother turning up at all!. Thank god we had a few young lads who came on at the end to relieve tired legs. For some of us it was our first 11 a side game for decades, and having never played together as team before there were some commendable performances, despite the difference in the average age of both teams!
In the 1st half Barnstoneworth got off to a dodgy start and quickly went down 1-0 due to a stupid mistake by Phil, however an equaliser from Steve soon put us back on track. This was short lived though when John, confused as to why there were 2 refs on the pitch, promptly through the ball to their striker, who I might add was wearing a black shirt and was rather dark skinned, who calmly belted the ball straight back into the net to go 2-1 ahead. Despite the set back, Barnstoneworth responded with another great goal from Steve and a well struck penalty to take the game to 3-2 at half time.
Totally fucked after the 1st half, the 2nd half didn't start much better when Pete the Toe, who is now even nearer to the transfer list, came on and deliberately hand balled in the area and Stan, the dodgy ref, awarded a penalty. Fortunately for Pete, Syed, Heswall Tandoori's captain, drove the ball wide of the right post. With that out of the way there were some impressive performances at the back from Jono, Mick and Big Bad Baby Face Phil who was spotted by the over capacity crowd controlling the ball with his beer gut... it was definitely gut to ball and not ball to gut. John redeemed himself with some excellent 2nd half saves to keep Barnstoneworth ahead, and has claimed the No.1 shirt and now wears it to bed every night... Anyone who wants it is going to have to fight him for it!
As the game progressed, Barnstoneworth really got it together and nobody wanted to come off. There was some great play in the middle from Frank, Robbo, Paul and Dave, and ever pressing forward, a quick lay off from Pricey saw Dave get out his sand wedge and curl a beauty over the defence into the top right corner to take the game to 4-2. Ten minutes later a great knock from Father Ted put Pricey through for goal 5 and an inch perfect cross from Paul saw Pricey slot in no. 6.
A great 1st game, a great result, but more importantly no injuries!
There was no crowd trouble and all terriers, whippets and ferrets were perfectly behaved.
After the game beer and curry was consumed.
