The Great Arctic Battle!
As desribed by Grappenhall as a mild frost, the super red and white army trekked on to Warrington to play their last game of 2010. Crossing the frozen tundra, over frozen rivers and canals, glacial ice sheets and passing herds of woolly mammoths courtesy of yet another of Pricey’s famous tours, Barnstoneworth arrived at Grappenhall Sports Club. And what awaited was a capacity crowd (2 guys on barge frozen solid on the canal) and a half frozen pitch, but nothing was going to stop the mighty red and white hunters going in to battle for a much needed 3 points in this arctic wasteland. And it must be said Grappenhall B (sorry Grappenhall A!) were equally as keen.
As the sun rose and the glacial ice sheets started to melt the ref announced the pitch fit for battle on the proviso of no harsh challenges. The pitch still half frozen in places didn’t deter Barnstoneworth who laced up their blades and dropped into formation. The famous starting 11 with the inglorious back four bastards were ready for action.
After Bono winning the toss BUFC gelled right from the refs whistle and played some nice passing football particularly in midfield and utilised both wings to the max. In the first 20 minutes Barnstoneworth had a little bit more of the play and created a few half chances. Then dreams of festive merriment set in… chestnuts roasting on open fires, small glasses of sweet Sherry, mince pies, traditional turkey roasts and Barnstoneworth drifted off to sleep only to be woken from their after Xmas dinner slumbers to find themselves a goal down. But this was the wake up call Barnstoneworth needed and they immediately got back into the game, and it wasn’t long before a defence splitting pass from Croucher (MOM) put Stevie Echo through to chip Grappenhall’s keeper just inside the box to level the game 1-1! There were some good first half performances from the whole team including Robbie, Jono, Croucher, Robbo and Sir Cuthbert who took one in the bollocks and nearly pissed himself, and Phil who was sweating pure alcohol from Saturday’s all day sesh on the ale. The remainder of the first half was end to end stuff and finished Grappenhall 1 v Barnstoneworth 1 with Barnstoneworth firmly believing they could return home with 3 points.
On came Frank for Pricey and the second half got under way with more good football from both sides, and what a great start. A superb run down the left wing by Croucher who put in a perfect cross for Jono to head the ball in for Barnstoneworth to take the lead 2-1. Frank was later replaced by Pricey as he could be clearly seen blowing smoke out of his arse from quite some distance and then everything changed. Grappenhall virtually substituted all of their B team for their A team in a desperate attempt to win the game. And things really did change, Grappenhall really started pressurising Barnstoneworth but failed to convert their chances due to goal mouth heroics from the inglorious back four bastards, and in particular Bonnet who just managed to stretch out a foot to put the ball out for a corner stopping a definite goal… he shall be crowned! The last 20 mins continued with more pressure from Grappenhall which resulted in a corner driven into the near post and up went Grappenhall’s striker to head in the equaliser. But Barnstoneworth weren’t deflated and battled on from the restart and a quick break against the run of play saw Stevie Echo put through for a clear winner, but he was held back and ankle tapped - surely a penalty! But no, the ref was blind and play continued with Barnstoneworth soaking up even more pressure right until the final whistle. The final score Barnstoneworth 2 v Grappenhall 2. A great game of football by both teams and a well deserved 1 point Xmas present for Barnstoneworth away from home.
The red and white hunters returned home safely from battle on the Arctic planes to The Pen where beer without food was consumed. Just one observation - Pete the Toe unfortunately didn’t get the opportunity to toe anything in his brand new Adidas boots! No injuries to report only aching legs, however Bonnet did look in agony as he made his way across the Sports Bar to the bog... Was it an injury or had he shit himself?
