Tyler 2’s Up with Pickard!
Jamie Tyler finally gave a master class in finishing as he destroyed the Seadogs with the aid of his new strike buddy; Emile Pickard. (Below)
The Bulldogs kicked off at an untraditional 2.00pm Sunday KO as the squad made their way to the Pindar School pitch straight from Sunday Mass. Unfortunately for the Bulldogs the later KO time did indeed make Carter unavailable as the current form hit-man of the squad (after his 1 goal) had Sunday dinner planned at his Nan’s.
A 16 man squad took to the field in uncharacteristic Alligator gold. The squad included for the first team Emile Pickard and new recruit Rob “Big Guns” Ascough. Rob joins the side on a free transfer and is set to dwarf Simon Allen and Christopher Stubbings as the new big man in town.
John Bateman made his debut as a goal tender as regular stopper Dave “The Save” Lovell took his place amongst the substitutes as they found themselves looking over their shoulders in fear of losing their mobiles from their jackets every time Dave took to the bench from his stretches!
The Bulldogs started brightly with new strike pair Tyler + Pickard looking dangerous with ball to feet. Pickard was impressing with some dazzling quick feet and hold up play. It didn’t take long for this dream team number to pay dividends as Pickard drew in the Seadog back 4 and released Tyler who finished in emphatic fashion on 22 minutes.
The Seadogs held firm after such a setback and battled back instantly as they put the Bulldogs under more pressure than a bouncy castle at Vanessa Feltz 40th B’day!
New Boy Ascough failed to get the desired distance on his back pass as Bateman strummed his guitar in net unawares of the dangers lurking outside his penno box. The onrushing Seadog striker took advantage as he planted the ball passed the Rock and Roll legend and level the scores to one point a piece.
The Bulldogs almost hit back Seadogs stylie as Mike Graysocks reacted quicker to a sizzlingly struck corner and some how managed to miss from 6 yards when a goal seamed more likely.
Pluminho rang the changes as Hick’s pre match exploits of 2 crates of Brothers and 4 Cuban cigars got the better of him. Graysocks also removed himself from the field of play after a nasty clash of heads which left the Ayton silky winger dazed and unable to spell his boyfriends name; G.L.I.T.T.E.R.
The biggest substitution saw the ineffective Rigg trudge down the tunnel after 30 minutes of wandering around the left wing aimlessly, and without a care in the world. Sample unfortunately bore the brunt of his workman like engine as he constantly found himself being two’d up down the left!
Jamie Tyler again scorched a shot just wide as he searched to put the Bulldogs in front. This was a scintillating performance from the Eastfield chav as he looked far more comfortable playing up top with the cuddly Emile Pickard than previous week’s strike partners.
Emile once again showed great tekkers on 39 minutes as he spun away from a challenge and released Tyler 1 on 1. The Chavtastic striker took one touch on the sprint and bulleted the ball passed the despairing dive of the keeper to give him a brace for today’s encounter.
Plumpton drew a corner which was wasted just before the break - with easily his hardest hit shot of the season. So hard the opposing no 1 lost the fingertips in his gloves as he palmed it around the post.
Half Time
Ayton Bulldogs 2 v 1 Seadogs
The 2nd half was a real treat for the mass fan base of both clubs as the Bulldogs created numerous chances to kill the game off. The Seadogs had the odd moment of their own as they looked to hit the Bulldogs on the counter.
Usual Aytoner Geoff Osguthorpe had developed a 4-0 head but lead on his opposite number Plumpton in the engine room. This lead was being cut quickly as Plumpton rose like a Scottish water Salmon and destroyed Ossie with a roaring growl of success. Plumpton then demoralised the Ayton favourite with a nut megs that left G.O in tears in the centre circle and levelled the scores at 4-4 (Megs being counted as 3 points).
The crowd pleasing Emile Pickard was unlucky not to register his own name on the score sheet as his mesmerising quick feet found him a yard of space in the Seadawgg box. Nick Cook also somehow managed to blaze wide when very well placed midway through the half.
The halfs best chance fell to Simon Rigg as he was released one on one. The usual gangly centre half strode forward and failed to remotely test the keeper as he made an absolute fool of himself in front of goal.
The chances were coming thick and fast as Carl Sample also found himself put clear with 30 yards of grass to eat up before making the box. Touch 1 & 2 did the biz but no 3 was an absolute shocker as the cultured left back toe pegged his touch to the smiling Seadog goalie. The Crowds chants of “your sh*t and you know you are” reigned down at Sample from the Pindar Road end.
Emile Pickard had taken a well deserved rest as he was sweating like a Jew in a shower from his immense amount of Kevin Davies like work up top.
The Bulldogs continued to press as Jamie Tyler went very close for his hat of tricks only to see his wonder strike fly a foot over the white sticks.
In stoppage time the Seadogs had the chance to make the Bulldogs pay for their missed chances as James Tadman somehow managed to miss his effort from fully 45 centre meters out from goal, it was a glaring miss. Tadman was taken in to the away changing rooms by Osguthorpe shortly after the conclusion of the match. Two gunshots heard moments later as Tadman failed to board the team coach.
The John Hick Man of the Match Award went to Phil Pickard for a master class striking performance that only lacked a goal. Let’s hope his alarm clock goes off the next Sunday morning so he can do it for real!!!
