The day is finally here, FC Gallery in the prem.
Up against last years div 1 winners Midshire electrical which should prove to be a great early test.
I anticipated a scrap for a shirt after mourinho had tried signing every man he knows and their dog, but it wernt to be.
Early signs looked like we would have a bare 11 at best, by 10am we had 12 and made our way down to the pitch to get changed whilst mason was still ringing round trying to make new signings.
10.15am and I'm started to get a bit excited, no grimley, no vidic and no colm. I downed my red bull and rang the missis. Get dressed love and being the kids over, I'm starting. (Mason is still frantically ringing round to find anybody to replace me)
10.20am and mason gets excited, and shouts "here he is".
I couldn't fucking believe it, colm is strolling across the park. I Got straight back onto the missis and said stay where u are, it ain't gonna happen.
We kicked off with me and dan Oates on the bench and started pretty lively and created a few chances. Midshire didn't seem to have much about them but soon found our week links. Ball after ball over the top and the 2 centre halfs looked like they were towing a static caravan, this almost resulted in us going down to 10 men early on from a shit Ricky smith challenge on the last man. Not sure what game the ref was watching but he definitely missed it.
Our break finally came 20 min in with damo causing chaos down the right and drawing a foul. Up stepped tevez, and I don't care what he says, it was a shot. Luckily it was a shit shot and damo out jumped the back 4 to give us a deserved lead.
30 min in and tevez turned into Phil Mitchell and decided to jump in 2 footed. Deserved yellow and lucky to still be on the pitch.
With gallery missing plenty of chances and woody pulling a shot out of the top shelf which took a good save to stop we still looked vulnerable to conceding with a ball over the top. I personally think an injured woody is better than a fit woody.
Our second goal came bang on half time. Midshires keeper took down fuck knows who but defiantly one of our players and a penalty was given. As I was not on the pitch the responsibility was given to Eddie, a shit stop and start run up resulted in the keeper laughing and then forgetting to dive. Great tactics Eddie.
2 nil up at the break, couldn't be happier!
A few wise words from the gaffa, not quite sure what he said as I'm not fluent in Chinese. All I know is dan Oates came on for Stena and I come on for, let me guess, I replaced the fucking Lino.
It didn't take long before damo set up jacko for gallery's 3rd and gave Midshire little hope of getting back in the game.
By now we were well in control of the game but the ref wanted to get involved, I think he must of been the fat kid at school that got bullied so he took it out on our fat lad. Everson getting kicked left right and centre and got given a yellow for it. Great reffing.
Talking of fat lads, Eddie soon got the 4th after being put through by tevez and treated us all to the truffle shuffle.
4 nil up it was now safe to bring myself on and replace woody. I wasn't trusted up top though, I had to sit just in front of the defence.
#utilityman
The free flowing footy continued and we were soon 5 up after burgerkamp finally completed a pass to assist Jacko's second of the day.
The best move of the the match came 10 minutes from the end as a fine one two with myself and smithy splits the defence in half, the deftest of touches bought the ball down exactly where I wanted it ( I was more surprised than the rest of the lads, so I had no idea what to do with it now) from 40 yards out I unleashed the most ferocious of shots and the keeper pulled out a worldie of a save and took away all my glory.
All in all a great team performance that took our first game in the prem to the top of the table, next week were at home to last years whipping boys blakesly. Still not to be taken lightly the points are ours if we want it.
Spudgun
