The invitation to avenge the previous week’s defeat was too tempting for FC Five Fathers, who were still licking their wounds from the 3-0 defeat at the hands of Malvern Town. Buoyed with optimism, the Green Army (yes… still in blue) headed back to Malvern with fresh tactics and set plays designed - this time - to get the better of their opponents. And they probably would have - had the opposition been the same…
Whether it was the different kit, unrecognisable players, or the ominous absence of everyone’s favourite left back Hacksaw Jim Duggan (“Ho!!!”), the Fathers soon realised they had been lured back under false pretence, and were due to play Malvern Town’s ‘A’ Team.
A debut for Dave in goal gave the Fathers a lift, and they took to the field with confidence under the leadership of new captain Ian who, to the delight of those sporting hangovers, won the toss and opted to play downhill. Despite an excellent start by the visitors which included Dan striking the woodwork, Malvern soon took the lead after breaking through the back line of Dan W, Dan S, James and Chrissie. A number of crucial saves from debutant Dave in goal couldn’t prevent Malvern from scoring a second goal shortly afterwards, much to the disapproval of the Tracksuit on the sidelines.
A few orders barked later, the visitors got what they deserved. Some nice interplay from Ian and Dan Y in midfield unleashed Tom G down the right wing, who managed took advantage of some sloppy defending to cut the ball back to Dan C, who duly slammed the ball into the top corner with salsa-like precision and timing. With the wind in their sales, the Green Army swarmed forward and nearly equalised through a Matt freekick which bent around the wall and nearly crept underneath the keeper. Moments later Matt nodded the ball into the path of Dan C who couldn’t keep his composure and fired high over the bar from yards out.
Angered by the turnaround in fortunes, and at Matt for kicking the ball out of the keeper’s hand in an attempt to win ‘cheekiest goal of the season’, Malvern replied with a third goal on the cusp of halftime to somewhat deflate the visitors.
Characteristic changes at half time saw Ian L, Nick and Tom D enter the field of play, shortly followed by Sam five minutes after kick off who replaced Tom G following a collision between his ribs and someone’s elbow. Playing uphill made it more difficult for the visitors, who were undone with a number of balls over the top of their defence as Malvern added further goals to their tally.
Midway through the second half Dan W, who effectively painted a big target on his back following two industrious first half challenges on opposition players, received the inevitable retribution as their left back lunged through the back of him with intent. Despite cries for the challenger to see red, Dan M (who was having one of his better performances this season as referee for the morning) refused to administer punishment and in doing so prevented a pitch invasion from seething Malvern supporters.
Moments later, another ‘enthusiastic’ challenge left Sam face down in their penalty area but cries of ‘penalty’ were waved away. Following two further goals for Malvern, the Fathers got the least they deserved when Ian E prodded a defence-splitting ball between their centre backs for Dan C to run onto and secure his brace with the final kick of the game.
FC Five Fathers have turned down invitations for a rematch against Malvern Town for the foreseeable future…
Man of the Match – Dan Wilson
Next match: Littleworth
